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Around SBN: SB Nation MMA Rankings for August 2010

Name of the Week: Iowa Edition

Hey, yo, new layout! Hope you dudes like it, it's mad shiny and whatnot, so, obviously, I'm pleased.

Also, congratulations to Christian Kuntz, who won possibly the deepest name of the week poll thus far with 26 votes, holding off Tariq Tongue and Knowledge Timmons with their 11 and 17 votes respectively. However, Tariq and Knowledge certainly have their spots in the Lorenzo Seaberry III Living Memorial Name Runners-Up Hall of Fame.

 

Anyways, the runners-up: cornerback Collin Sleeper (ironically, not a sleeper pick), sophomore defensive end LeBron Daniel (who has the unfortunate distinction distinction of being from Cleveland and named LeBron, and also having a first name for a last name), wide out JoJo Pregont, and wide receiver James Hurt (JAMES HURT!)

On to the nominees:

#91, Broderick Binns: I only saw one of the Lord of the Rings movies, so I can neither confirm nor deny that there were black hobbits. But if there was one, his name woulda been Broderick Binns. No doubt.

Broderick is a sophomore and has started every game at defensive end for the Hawkeyes, recording 4 sacks and 6.5 tackles for loss, and, somewhat oddly, leading the team in pass breakups with 8. He had one of the game-saving kick blocks in the Northern Iowa game, so, that's Brod.

#27, Jewel Hampton: You could go one of two ways if your name is Jewel: you could become a nonthreatening female pop singer, or you could spend your entire life moping about how your parents named you a name that isn't a name, but is, in fact, a thing you put on a necklace.

Hampton chose neither, and is instead a decent running back, doing the whole short-yardage thing last year and putting up seven touchdowns as a true freshman last year. Unfortunately, Jewel got injured before the season and hasn't seen the field for the Hawkeyes.

#23, Paki O'Meara: Oh, where to start with good ol' Paki. 

First off, I cannot decipher Paki's origin as hard as I try. O'Meara is an Irish name, but Paki is a name believed to have been taken from little microscopic bacteria that fell from a asteroid from Mars. I really don't have much more to elaborate on. 

Paki is a junior and the second member of an exceptionally talented name crew at running back. He's seen sparing action in the past two seasons, running for 23 yard against Maine last year, and is breaking into the lineup now with all of Iowa's running back injuries. He caught a pass for 14 yards last week against Indiana, and had two rushes for only two yards as well. 

#7, Marvin McNutt: The name McNutt is just such a silly last name. Maybe it's just me who thinks this, but if my name was Marvin McNutt, I'd walk around everywhere with a huge smile on my face. It's probably just me.

Heh. McNutt.

Marvin was a quarterback when he redshirted last year, but is a pretty decent wide receiver. He's not the go-to target, but he's brought down four touchdowns thus far, including a 92-yard game changer in a 155-yard outing last week against Indiana. Despite only starting four games, he's second on the team with 456 yards receiving.

 

And my pick for the winner...

# 43, Pat Angerer: An angerer. A person whose job is to anger others. An equivalent name would be Greg Pisseroffer, or Steve Guywhotellsraciallyinsensitivejokestopeopleofthatraceforthesolepurposeofprovokingthemerer. And he's a linebacker. Which is probably the most angering position possible. 

Not just a linebacker, but a damn good one: Pat was second-team all-Big Ten last year, and will most likely be first-team this year. He has the most tackles on a defense that's been murdering opponents, not to mention a pick and two forced fumbles. He was on the Lott Trophy watch list at the beginning of the year, so, yeah. Angerer.

 

Vote or die!

Poll
Name of the week on Iowa?
Broderick Binns
8 votes
Jewel Hampton
2 votes
Paki O'Meara
16 votes
Marvin McNutt
39 votes
Pat Angerer
40 votes

105 votes | Poll has closed

0 recs  |  Comment 4 comments |

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Comments

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Bust a McNutt

The best part about Marvin McNutt is that he’s their deep-threat receiver, so you have to worry about McNutt busting a big one all over your defense. Just be glad the innocent Christian Kuntz is on offense.

by Batman42 on Nov 3, 2009 11:50 PM CST via mobile reply actions  

lol at the black hobbitt, awesome

by Loretta8 on Nov 4, 2009 7:48 AM CST reply actions  

Shane DiBona isn't even an honorable mention?

This is an outrage. His name ends in “Bona”. Like boner. Like a penis. This is hilarious, dammit. Was there not room for two genitalia-themed names or something? Because I’m telling you right now, there can never be enough genitalia-themed names.

by NorseHawk on Nov 5, 2009 3:41 PM CST reply actions  

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