Name of the Week: Purdue Edition

Law Buckeye was kind enough to point out an alarming stat in the comments on Sunday: I've done the Name of the Week for NU's four games. For the first week, I picked the winner myself, and, sho nuff, NU won. For the last two, I've let you guys pick them, via polls. And, uh, not so much.

I've wracked my brain a lot about how I as a blogger/journalist can make the ethical decision here, and what I've come to realize is that perhaps the Wildcats' failures are due less to my decision to allow you guys to vote on the names, but more on you guys' decision to not vote for the person I think has the best name. (You'll remember, you've incorrectly picked Syracuse WR Van Chew and Minnesota RB Shady Salamon over my picks of long snapper Maximilian Leo and fullback Logan U'u, respectively.)

So when you vote, I urge you to consider the consequences of your picks. When you guys rob my candidate of name greatness, you're pretty much launching the Wildcats straight to defeat. Something to think about.

Anyway, first, some runners up: Kevin Pamphile (because I think his last name is the technical term for "someone who is sexually attracted to pamphlets") Caleb TerBush (whose last name is inexplicably double-capped) Al-Terek McBurse (who, like Shaq, is a Irish Muslim, apparently),  and last, but not least, DeVarro Greaves

To be honest, I'm not particularly thrilled with the lineup this week - Purdue has a pretty weak name class. No U'u's, or even Lorenzo Seaberry III's. 

#70, LaSalle Cooks: Not a particularly great name, but I'm a sucker for names that are, in fact, complete sentences, especially when the first name is "LaSalle." Anyway, LaSalle is a redshirt freshman DT, and hasn't recorded any stats that I can tell yet.

#34, Antavian Edison: Again, not a spectacular name, but one that merits inclusion, especially when you picture Antavian inventing the light bulb. On the field, Antavian is a true freshman wide receiver, who caught a 15 yard touchdown reception against Toledo, in addition to running for five yards, but hasn't touched the ball since.

#48, Jared Crank: I feel like in light of the Jason Statham movie, Crank is a pretty awesome last name, but Jared is such a nondescript first name, it sort of runis the name. Jared Crank is like the name of a superhero's brother, who is an accountant. Anyway, as a fullback, Jared's deal on the field is blocking for ridiculously good running back Ralph Bolden, but the sophomore also busted out a 14-yard run against Oregon, and also has a 4-yard catch to his credit on the year.

And my pick for you to vote for....

#3, Waynelle Gravesande: Yeah, Waynelle Gravesande.

First off, it's pronounced "grave-sandy" according to Purdue's media guide. But what I like about this name is that "Waynelle" matches up with "Gravesande" really well, they're both really long, very poetic, and both aren't actual names. If Waynelle weren't a football player, he could totally be a British dude from the 1500's. It's a mad courtly name. It just rolls off the tongue.

For football, Waynelle is a sophomore wide-out who has done some punt returning this year, and had two receptions last season against Indiana but none this year.

 

So anyway, rock the vote. Sorry it's such a lackluster name group, but deal with it, folks. What do you want me to do, make up good names?

State your claim for your candidate in the comments section.

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