I! YOU! PEE! YOU! I!
Here's what you need to know about IUPUI:
1. George Hill went there!
2. It stands for Indiana University-Purdue University at Indianapolis, which means they are #B1G, I think.
3. If you pronounce their name, it is the mascot for the Montreal Expos.
4. They are very bad at basketball. Kenpom 296, with their only win against non-DI "Indiana Northwest" and losses to Utah Valley -- Wolverines -- Evansville -- Purple Aces!!! -- and Southwest Missouri State -- um... Bears? (Upon checking: no, it is not Bears.)
5. They have players named Marcellus Barksdale -- important underworld overlord characters in Pulp Fiction AND The Wire wrapped into one! -- Justus Stanback -- STAND BACK, JUSTICE -- Ja'Rob McCallum -- JA'ROB -- and Cortell Busby.
But here's my story.
On a Friday night about two years ago, very much like this one, I asked you idiots whether I should go to my favorite bar, McGee's, or a basketball game against Mississippi Valley State. You guys are jerks, and told me to go to the awful basketball game. Overwhelmingly, in fact.
I was pretty mad, because I really wanted to go to McGee's. You also made the girl I told I would go to McGee's with pretty mad. But as I look back on it, I probably remember that night better than your average Friday night. We ended up having a pretty fun time even though we didn't go to the bar where we generally had the best time.
It's not that I blacked out or whatever at McGee's -- although that did happen -- it's just that I went to McGee's almost every Friday. Those nights at that bar were the best nights -- $20 open bar! What I'd give right now for a $20 open bar! -- but they definitely blend together. Whereas that night where I made my friends mad by making them go to a terrible basketball game is a weird memory.
It's a Friday night, and even for the nerdiest of you guys, that's a night off. I don't want to tell you to go to a basketball game against IUPUI, because it won't be that fun. What I'm saying is: if you feel like your Friday nights kinda blend together, go to this basketball game. If you go to to many basketball games, get stupidly drunk. It's the most random, uncommon things you do that'll stand out the most.
Or you could go to McGee's, because that's fun.
Personally, I'm going to drink heavily and go to bars that don't offer all the beer I want for $20. Have fun!