Enjoy Joseph, the first of Northwestern's Joneses:
Origin mythJones is from Plano, Illinois, which apparently is a place juuuuuuuuuuuuuuust outside of the range you could conceivably say is somewhere in the Chicago metropolitan area, and per the Wikipedia, is home to Dennis Hastert, the place where the mechanical reaper was invented, and where a lot of "Man of Steel" was filmed. JOSEPH JONES IS SUPERMAN. Anyway, Plano is not in Texas, and Joseph earned all-conference at running back there, while playing a little bit of defense. But he didn't seem like a running back at the college level, and was considered either an athlete or a safety by scouting services, ranking as the No. 28 player in 247's composite from Illinois and the No. 112 safety in the country per Scout. Some services had him as a three-star, Rivals had him as a two-star. While not necessarily impressive in the ratings, Jones did impress on the track, winning state in the 110-meter hurdles. The fastest hurdler in Illinois, y'all!
Here's highlights, with the obligatory Fort Minor:
Analysis: who knows if he can make moves and stuff, woah, he's fast at running in straight lines against kids from the sticks. Like, really fast. He also seems difficult to tackle for said kids from the sticks.
At NorthwesternHe wore a shirt. It was red.
Anagram of choice
Discovering the Wildcats' true inner selves through spelling
Joseph Jones, anagrammed is
NO JEEP JOHN
It's a guy named John who doesn't have a jeep. Look, what do you want me to do?
JONES POWER RANKING
There are five Joneses on Northwestern. Here is a ranking:
Relevant musical selection
"Leave (Get Out)" The Counting Crows
Look, any chance I can get to post 2000's-era female R&B/pop-type singers, I will take. JoJo, it turns out, sorta peaked early: she was 14 when that song came out. Still a jam, though.