Northwestern vs. Maine football: Q-and-A with A Guy From Maine

Bob DeChiara-US PRESSWIRE

We interviewed Maine football expert A Guy From Maine about Maine football. He knows nothing about Maine football.

Normally, game week, we exchange a Q-and-A with an opposing blogger. This is a problem when Northwestern plays Maine, because there are no opposing sports blogs.

However, I looked to my past, and remembered the blinding success of my pregame interview with Bro In A Wisconsin-Milwaukee Sweatshirt to properly prepare us for Northwestern's basketball game against Wisconsin-Milwaukee. However, looking back upon my life, I haven't had that many interactions with Mainiacs. Off the top of my head, I think I have met two in my life. One was this girl in my dorm freshman year. One is a current junior at Northwestern. After debating which one to email completely out of the blue, I went with the latter, who will henceforth be referred to as "A Guy From Maine."

He was more than happy to answer my questions and provide zero analysis of Maine football.

Take it away, Guy from Maine!

1. Tell us, quickly, everything you know about Maine football.

No one on the Maine football team is actually from Maine and students consider them to be "From the ghetto" (referring to any place that has more buildings than trees). (Ed. Note: there are 11 players from Maine on the Maine roster, which is actually a pretty small percentage, when you think about it.)


2. Northwestern already beat the Golden Bears of Cal this season. What makes Black Bears more dangerous/is Maine actually overrun by bears like it is in my imagination?

I actually have had blackbears in my backyard twice in the past 3 years and they are actually vegetarians....I dont think the Wildcats have much to worry about this week


3. Where does "Maine Black Bears football" fall on a list of sporting allegiances the average person from Maine has?

Just below the Maine Red Claws NBA-D league team, and right above the kids from the Sandlot.


4. How many items of L.L. Bean clothing do you own? Does the Maine football team wear L.L. Bean clothing on the field and if not, why not?

I own multiple articles of LLBean clothing, including the only parka Ive ever seen that can keep you warm living on Lake Michigan. And unfortunately, flannel is against the uniform policies of the NCAA so I do not believe University of Maine will be wearing LLBean this weekend.


5. Give us a prediction for Saturday's game.

Northwestern 45- Maine 10. Colter will throw for 4 touchdowns and run for over 150 yards.

Thanks, Guy from Maine! That was extremely unhelpful!

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